Morning In America - January 2025

Looking ahead to the post-inaguration headlines of a New America

Jack loved retirement in beautiful Fort Myers.

Opening his eyes to another perfect Sunday morning, he couldn’t wait to get up before Kathy, to another radiant, rising sun, the salty smell of the ocean and the whiff of coffee, that Sunday paper on his front porch.

With a fresh pot brewing, he checked outside the front window to ensure his red Victory flag was flying. It’d been windy all week, causing some of his neighbor’s Victory flags to get tangled up in their front bushes. Peeking down the street today, every flag appeared proudly at attention.

A neat, orderly row of unfurled red joy.

On his welcome mat sat the Sunday edition of TRUTH TODAY, patiently waiting for him like a puppy. Recently rebranded from what had been USA Today, TRUTH TODAY sported a recycled tag line from yesteryear - Only (real!) News That’s Fit To Print. And true to its tagline, TRUTH * TODAY is now the only national paper in circulation, as laws raced through by the days-old 119th congress effectively shut down all subversive publications like the New York Times, the Washington Post, the Wall Street Journal, and everywhere people used to get their heads filled with a whole lot of crazy.

Jack sat on his patio chair and popped on reading glasses. Time to study today’s above-the-fold headlines.

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TRUTH * TODAY

         ONLY (real!) NEWS THAT’S FIT TO PRINT

            Sunday, January 7th, 2025

THE LEAD:

Kelly Accepts Final Rose - Palm Beach, FL - In a stunning reality TV surprise, 115 million viewers tuned in last night to witness conservative talk show personality Megyn Kelly accept the Final Rose, and be named Vice President to the incoming administration. Gov. Kristi Noem,Tulsi Gabbard, Rep. Elise Stefanik and six other bedazzled finalists huddled around the iconic Mar-a-Lago fountain in tantalizing anticipation. But ultimately it was Kelly, the competition’s dark horse, who would dance away with the night’s biggest prize. Kelly once famously sparred with… cont pg 4

POLITICS:

President Re-Elect Honors Pardoned Patriots On 1st Annual Victory Day - Washington DC - A truly “wild” celebration broke out on the steps of the US Capitol yesterday morning, as the President Elect unveiled a giant bronze statue commemorating the recently freed heroes that had “fought like hell” to ensure…cont pg 3

Bannon Signals Upcoming Military Reorg - Tucson, AZ - Incoming Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, ADM Steven K. Bannon spoke Friday at the Tucson, AZ VFW’s annual fundraiser, outlining how a scenario where top military leadership undermines a sitting president “can never be repeated.” Bannon explained how a new selection process for all flag officers in every service will ensure the kind of loyalty to…cont pg 11

New Administration Members Announced - Palm Beach, FL - White House Press Secretary Tucker Carlson announced several more incoming administration appointees on Friday. LTG Michael Flynn will be named Ambassador to Russia. Rudolph Guliani will head a newly formed department for the Assurance Of Election Transparency (AOET). New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft will spearhead a new domestic sex-trafficing task force. New York Jets Quarterback Aaron Rodgers will join the administration as the head of the CDC…cont pg 16

House Drafts Kagan Articles Of Impeachment  - Washington, DC - House of Representatives Speaker Mike Johnson announced Friday that Articles of Impeachment have been drafted against Supreme Court Associate Justice Elena Kagan, citing her scathing 6-3 minority dissent from the majority court’s recent repeal of portions of the 1863 Emancipation Proclamation, where the court found then-President Abraham Lincoln had exercised “extreme executive overreach without input from Congress”. Kagan’s strongly-worded dissent drew fire from the right, which characterized her opinion as “unhinged juris-imprudence”….cont pg 7

NATIONAL NEWS:

Services For California Governor - Sacramento, CA - The sudden, unexplained New Years Day passing of California Governor Gavin Newsome remains under investigation by the California state coroner. A private family memorial will be held next Saturday, January 13th, however federal officials do not anticipate releasing the body for another three weeks, pending toxicology…cont pg 12

Mississippi Strikes “Abortion” From State Lexicon - Jackson, MS - Mississippi Department of Education head Dr. Lance Evans announced Friday the complete striking of the word “abortion” from all official Mississippi government documents, communications and education materials. In its place, Dr. Evans unveiled a new unique emoji depicting a binkie with a slash mark running diagonally across the…cont pg 11

Boebert Named NRA’s 66th President - Rifle, CO  - Firing an oversized Smith & Wesson 686 into the air, a jubilant Lauren Boebert celebrated being named the National Rifle Association’s 66th President at Skeeter’s Lounge, along with friends, family and supporters. Vowing to build on the outstanding work of outgoing President Wayne LaPierre, Boebert touted exciting new initiatives such as “Armories in Every School” and “Guns for Tots”, which...cont pg 22

GSOA Honors Local Congressman - Jacksonville, FL - Thursday, the Jacksonville national chapter of the Girl Scouts Of America (GSOA) presented an award to FL 1st District congressman and incoming House Ethics Committee Chairman Matthew Gaetz, “For exemplary civic support of local women and girls.” Now cleared of all ethics charges himself, Gaetz offered sixteen-year old troop leader Stacey Katz a personal tour of Capitol Hill…cont pg 17

THE WORLD:

European Trade Organization Cuts Deal - Paris, France  - ETO Secretary General Jens Stoltenberg announced Friday the official end of nearly three-year long hostilities between Russia and Ukraine. Russia will retain full sovereignty over all occupied territories south and west of the current line connecting the repatriated territories of Bahkmut, Avdiivka, Robotyne, and Krynky, and will permanently retain the Crimean peninsula. Russian President Vladimir Putin hailed the deal, characterizing relations with the remaining 17 countries of what was for past 75 years known as NATO, as “fair, pragmatic, and a welcome step forward” since the departure of the United States from…cont pg 3

LIFESTYLES

Pg 14 - Beautification of the American Housewife  -  Essay by Candace Owens 

PROFILES

Pg 17 - Ilhan Omar - What incarceration at Guantanamo is teaching me - Profile by Ben Shapiro

SPORTS

Pg 19 - The Pledge of Allegiance: What College Football Desperately Needs - By Sen. Tommy Tuberville

RELIGION

Pg 21 - The “Ten Commandments”; A Evangelical‘s Guide: Ten Tips For How To Never Get Caught - Essay by Jerry Falwell Jr.

OPINION

Pg 23 - Wiki-leaks and Assassinations: How The Dark Arts Enable Our American Freedom - Essay by Associate Editor Roger Stone

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THANK YOU to the millions who donated so patriotically. Because of YOU, and the Infinite grace of our beloved LORD and SAVIOR JC, these prophesied times have finally come to pass. And as TRUTH no longer requires any further legal defense funding, the millions of dollars YOU unselfishly provided will now go towards cleaning up this mess we’ve all inherited. Always trust the TRUTH.

ALEX JONES is back!! Check out his newest product line - Page 22.

Upgrade to TRUTH PLUS for only $12.99/month and save 25% on the hottest new items to commemorate the coronation of our beloved 47. Pages 2, 4, and 26.

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Neatly separating the Sunday sections in his lap, Jack always started with the national news, appreciating how TRUTH * TODAY didn’t scream so much about world chaos with plenty of it right here to deal with. Megyn Kelly sure looked great for 53, Jack thought, finally remembered who she was. After staring at her picture, he decided she’d make one damn fine VP. Bannon looked amazing in that fancy military getup, but Jack’s problem with the photo was that Bannon hadn’t bothered to trim that wild mane of hair. And Gaetz…a good kid, Jack thought, remembering his own wholesome, skirt-chasing days of a crazyass youth. He wondered how many boxes of cookies Gaetz bought. Thin Mints were Jack’s favorite.

On this perfect sunny Florida Sunday, free of all the political bickering, competing agendas, the vile liberal bias and the constant threat of foreigners on every street corner, this morning felt supremely peaceful on Jack’s street. He couldn’t recall the last time he’d even checked the Glock 43 in his nightstand drawer but felt good knowing he’d probably never need it. Not here anyway.

And with the corrupt devil’s army finally chased from the national seat of power, Joe felt deeply redeemed. He wondered how ‘ol Rush was seeing all this from up in Heaven. Talent on loan from God. Amen, brother! Oh, what a hoot he was.

There was only enough space in Jack’s mind for one Truth, and he appreciated this one, all neatly folded in his lap. A source he knew, and that knew him even better.

He noticed his next-door neighbor stepping outside to collect his own morning paper. “Hey, Bill. Fine morning our Lord has made, eh?”

Bill tightened his bathrobe, bending to pick up the TRUTH * TODAY lying face up on his

welcome mat. “That’s a fact.” Bill surveyed the quiet street, taking in the early morning Florida perfection. “You have a blessed day, Jack.” Bill called out, then turned back inside his front door. Jack nodded in reply and smiled. He took in a satisfying sip of his still-warm coffee.

It was truly a new Morning in America. TIME TO WAKE UP